15 most shocking things Simon Cowell said on live TV

December 20, 2013

Simon Cowell

1. I have heard some bad performances in my time. And I can honestly say that this is one of the worst of them.

2. Shave off your beard and wear a dress. You would be a great female impersonator.

3. The object of this competition is not to be mean to the losers but to find a winner. The process makes you mean because you get frustrated.

4. The end of the animal trade would leave more time to trap or beat to death pop star wannabes.

5. If we had to choose one American Idol to go out to dinner with, it would be Fantasia. There are no airs and graces about her… I like her.

Simon Cowell2

6. I want people to understand that from the minute Lady Gaga arrived, she created a new set of rules: being different is good; embrace it.

7. If you imagine Madonna, Bobby Brown, and Dracula had a child it would be you. But in a weird way I quite liked you.

8. There’s as much chance of you being a pop star or a rock star as me flying to the moon tomorrow for breakfast.

9. To a particularly confident young hopeful Cowell was particularly scathing: “At 20, you’re cocky and you think you can rule the world, and you get it all wrong.”

10. It was like you had an argument with Britney Spears, got drunk, and decided to scream the song at her.

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11. If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning.

12. The only people with power today are the audience. And that is increasing with Twitter, Facebook, and everything else. We cater to their likes and dislikes, and you ignore that at your peril.

13. Anything I shouldn’t laugh at makes me laugh. I mean, I’m bad at that, when somebody is singing something terribly and I’m thinking to myself, ‘If I laugh now, this is the absolute worst thing I could ever do,’ and then I start laughing and I can’t stop.

14. I’ve never bought a Dylan record. A singing poet? It just bores me to tears. I’ve got to tell you, if I had 10 Dylans in the final of ‘American Idol,’ we would not be getting 30 million viewers a week. I don’t believe the Bob Dylans of this world would make ‘American Idol ‘a better show.

15. If I said to most of the people who auditioned, ‘Good job, awesome, well done,’ it would have made me actually look and feel ridiculous. It’s quite obvious most of the people who turned up for this audition were hopeless.

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